Conquering dysfunctions, quirks, and potentially embarrassing insecurities

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The most powerful ones don't conquer their dysfunctions, quirks, and potentially embarrassing insecurities.

If you want to get back to work, then find a graceful escape.This is particularly useful in personal relationships.So when she comes to me with a problem, instead of immediately trying to solve it, I ask her what she wants me to do.I am surprised, disappointed even, by the number of times she says, Just listen. Wait, I want to tell her, I have ideas.But after more than ten years of marriage, I’ve realized that listening is sometimes all the help she wants from me.In the end, I continued to work with Hunter and his company for several years.Instead of focusing on Hunter, I focused on the goal of creating a more functional, productive management process for the company.Have you read it? I asked.Yes, he answered, and it’s not bad.You know, I thought, I might like this guy after all.Not that it matters.Knowing what outcome you want will enable you to focus on what matters and escape the whirlwind of activity that too often leads nowhere fast.Where We AreSlow down your momentum.Pause in the moment.Expand your view of yourself.Be open to your extraordinary potential.Focus on your outcome.They’ll send you up in the air to see what’s below more clearly.They’ll help you experiment and tap deeply into resources you may have forgotten were there.And they’ll guide you to draw from your bottomless well of talent to achieve concrete things in the world.What particular things?What specific talent?Find Your FocusIn the introduction to part 1, I shared the first part of my story.I explored acting, medical school, rabbinical school, and investment management.And as I experimented, I began to descend back to earth, but in a slightly different location.Not a different country, but a different city.Or maybe just a different street in the same city.While ultimately, I didn’t want to be an actor, rabbi, doctor, or investment manager, there were things about each of those roles that were attractive to me.I wanted to be playful, express myself, and experiment.I wanted to have, and express, meaning and depth in my work.I wanted to be inspired and to inspire others.And I wanted to make good money.I loved the client partnerships and relationships I developed.I had a passion for ideas of all sorts, and it made me happy to use them to help people make changes in their companies and in their lives.I loved thinking and writing and speaking in ways that inspired others.What I didn’t like was running a consulting company, which to me often felt like the opposite of consulting.Instead of inventing innovative customized solutions to a particular problem, I had to create standardized methods that I could replicate across all my consultants around the world.Instead of spending my time with clients, I was spending my time managing other consultants.Instead of thinking up new ideas or writing or speaking, I was spending my time running, and growing, the business.If I consulted in a certain way, I could combine what attracted me about being an actor, doctor, rabbi, and investment manager into one.And it would be the perfect job for me since I would be leveraging my strengths, embracing my weaknesses, asserting my differences, and pursuing my passions.That, I discovered, was my way back down to earth.To spend my time on the things that are important to me.The things that make me different, that make me matter.Still, as I began to practice consulting in my own, new way, it wasn’t always easy.I failed repeatedly.Sometimes, when one part of my plan wasn’t working, I questioned the whole plan.Other times, I became so focused on doing things a certain way that I missed great opportunities around me.And periodically, when I didn’t know what to do, I froze and didn’t do anything.Those are pitfalls that you may or may not avoid, but knowing about them ahead of time will help you move through them as you find your focus.It’s not a lack of effort.It’s a lack of direction and focus.In order